Time Standing Still
by Jenn Sidle
Summary: A horrible nightmare is happening right before Nick’s and Sara's eyes. [Nick then Sara POV Character's Death] Please R
1. Nick's Nightmare

_A/N: So this is my first writing like this, so go easy on me! I wanted to try something new, so I gave this a try. I do hope you like this! Please let me know what you think. I would like to know if I should ever try this again. Thank you for even reading this is the first place. You rock!_

_Ps. This is my second copy of this story. I don't have anyone to go over my stories of me, so I had a look at this one and fixed it. So thank to all to reviewed the last copy and I do hope this one is better! _

_JennSidle_

**Time Standing Still**

Looking down at my hands all covered with blood I knew this all had to be a horrible nightmare. How could any of this be real? All the color in your face was fading away. You are looking more and more like a ghost. You can't leave me like this. I will never make it without you. You have always been there for me, the one person I could count on.

The years came flooding back to me, as if I was asleep in a dream. I still remember the first day I saw you at the lab. I knew you were there to investigate one of our own, but I still could not stop looking in awe at you beauty and grace. There was something about you that I could never seem to put into words. All I knew was I felt it in my heart. We became close and I could not be more thrilled to know such a wonderful woman. The day you told me that you had feelings for Grissom, my heart broke. I knew then that I would be nothing more then a good friend. But if that was all that I was ment to be, I was going to take it. Our friendship grew even more once you knew that you could trust me. We are like brother and sister now and I could not be happier.

This night was like any other. Nothing seemed to be any different. But if I only knew then what I know now, I would not have let Grissom even let you out of the lab. But then you would have argued and said you could take care of yourself. That is the kind of person you are not to run away form anything.

It all happened to fast. It did not even seem real. We went to the scene, like we all ways do. It was all clear, or so that's what they said. We entered the room and began to do our work. We talked about nothing important, or so I would have though then, but now looking back it might be the last we will ever have again. No one seemed to realize that there was a back door leading in. The man who had killed his wife and ran decided to come back again. None of us heard him come in and we never though twice. But then it was to late he had the gun on me. I could do nothing, not even say a word. Then you turned around and before I even knew it you had your gun aimed at him. The way his body moved, you could tell that he was scared. As he held the gun against my head, I could see the fear in your eyes.

All you said was **"Mr. Simons you don't want to do this."** And you held your gun tight. I could only imagine what you saw there. A mad man, who has already kill, now holds a friend with nothing to lose. If only I would have turned around and saw him coming none of this would be happening.

You tell him that you can help him if he only put the gun away. No one moved or even seemed to breath what felt like an eternity, but in fact was only a few minutes. Then your words seem to affect the man as he loosened up his grip. So I took action not thinking of what I might be about to lose. I rammed my elbow into his gut making him loose the grip he had on me. As I tried to get away he pushes me hard and I fell back into the glass table. As I fall I heard three bangs before I hit the table. The glass shatters, cutting me up pretty bad, but none of it seems to matter. I got to my feet as quick as I could and saw you standing there with your gun pointed at the fallen man.

Your aim was incredible, right through the heart. Then the nightmare truly began. I remember as I fell, three shots being fired. As I look down at the man I can only see one hole in his ratty white shirt. What happen to the other two shots then? I turn to you and in your eyes I can see pain, fear and hopelessness. As you fall to the ground. I race to your said and hold you tight. I push back your jacket and reveal a horrible sight. The two shots had found you, one in the stomach and one in the cheats. Why was this happening? Why? That was what was running through my head as I tried to stop the bleeding.

I remember then yelling for help as loud as I could. Then I snapped back into reality, now aware of what was happening around me. It must have been right after the shots were fired that Brass and the other man came running in. The other man was bent down over mad man checking if he was still alive and Brass was on his phone. All I can remember him saying was that there was a CSI down and they needed an ambulance right way.

Your face is so pale now. I just want to look away. This was a woman who was always strong and brave, but now is fading away. Your breaths are getting shallower as I begin to cry. I just keep tell you to hold in there that help is on the way, when all I want to do is run and hide. You look up with your big eyes and ask me if I am ok? That is just the kind of girl you are, always looking out for me. I try to say something as tears form in your eyes. "Nicky I'm so cold. Please don't let me go." All I can do is try not to cry harder. I know that I am loosing you. I tell you that you are strong and that you have to fight, for me and for the others.

The others, oh god. The team was like a family. We loved each other in our own special way. Catharine, she looked out for you more then you may have ever known. She though of you as a daughter, even if the two of you always seemed to fight. Warrick, man that guy loved you. The two of you might have started off on the wrong foot, but soon you became his family and he said that you made his life better in so many ways. Grissom, sometimes that man can be so dumb. He knows the feelings you have for him and yet he is afraid to show his. He has got the best woman right in front of him and is too blind to see it. But then the way he seems to light up when ever you name is mentioned. And then there is Greg, oh god Greg. He has the biggest crush on you. You are the only reason that he even wanted to become a CSI in the first place. He is going to be so lost if anything happens to you.

A hand on my shoulder snapped me back from my thoughts. Brass's hand was on my shoulder. "Nick you have to let her go. They need to do their work." I looked up and see the men yelling to each other as they took you out of my arms. Your eyes are now closed. Had you closed them while I was still holding you? I can't seem to remember.

It was all going to fast. The paramedics were working so hard. They said something about you not breathing as they started CPR. Why were you not breathing? This was not the strong woman I knew, just to stop like that. Everything seemed to be in a dream like haze. I stood up slowly as they placed you on to a stretcher and they continued CPR. Then I could hear them yell, "We have a pulse. We need to ventilate her and get to the hospital fast." As they started out the door I could hear "Were loosing her."

I could not take anymore of it. I could feel my knees start to give out, but then an arm supported me up and lead me to a chair. "Nick your hurt." It was Brass that was talking to me. "You need to get your back looked at." I had completely forgotten about falling into the coffee table. The truth was the pain that I felt from that was nothing like the pain that I was feeling in my heart right now.

Another paramedic looked at my back. Took out some shards of glass and told me that I was going to need some stitches. I did not care about myself at that moment. I needed to get to the hospital. I need to keep sure that you were all right. I headed to the door but Brass stopped me. He told me I was in no condition to be driving and that he would take me. I had no words for him, so I just nodded.

The car ride was spent in silence. Brass had his light and sirens going. He wanted to get there as fast and as bad as I did and it showed in his eyes. Then it hit me. Did the others know what was going on? Did they even know that you had been hurt? I was just about to ask, when Brass said quietly "Grissom and the others have been phoned and they are on the why to the hospital as we speak." It was as if Brass could read my thoughts. But is that was true, did Brass know how guilty I feel? How responsible I feel? How it should be me being rushed to the hospital not you?

The next few hours were going to be the hardest of my life. I just wanted to rewind time and start everything over. I still had so much to tell you, so this could not be your time. Walking through those doors into the emergency room, it felt like all the warmth in the world was gone. I saw the others standing together off in one corner. Then they saw Brass and myself coming up to them. They all looked so horrible, like they would never smile again. Catherine was crying and Warrick was comforting her the best that he could. Grissom just sat there, staring off into space. And Greg was pacing back and forth. Then all eyes were on me. I could see the fear in their eyes once they saw the state I was in. Small cuts and scratches all over my body. Catharine got up and gave me a hug, but once her touch fell apon my back I flinched and took a step back. I did not want to worrier her any more then she all ready was. I told her that I was fine, I had been checked out at the scene and I would take care of my back later. I sat down next to Grissom and asked if there was any word on you. They just shook their heads.

Time pasted maybe an hour or two. I really can not recall. We all just sat there in silence. There was still no word on you. For the first time since I got to the hospital Grissom spoke. He turned to me and asked me how this happened. This must have been going through all their minds. How they ended up at the hospital. What want wrong that night that one of their friend's life was in the balance and another was hurt? So I told them all what happened. But it was like telling them a nightmare I had the night before. None of it seemed real. How could this truly be happening? That was what I kept asking myself.

A doctor came out of the double doors and walked over to the group. The look on this man's face, I knew the news was not going to be good. "We have done everything that we can for her. We have stopped the bleeding, but too much damage has been done." The man looked down at the ground. I knew this had to be hard for him to tell us. "I am sorry I don't believe that she will make it through the night. She is a wake now. And asked if she could see you all. She is very weak and might not have the strength to do much talking, but please if you follow me now I will show you to her room." The man lead us to your room and each of us went in, one by one.

I was the last one to come in. Everyone had left crying. How could we be loosing you? This was not the way it is ment to be. I see you fragile body lying in the bed. All the life had seemed to leave the room. Your were once so full of life, now you look like a porcelain doll that would break with a single touch. I walk slowly to your bed. As I come closer you open you eyes. "_Nick?_" you say barely above a whisper. I tell you that I am here. A very weak smile forms on your face. I can tell that we were loosing you. It took all your strength to even keep your eyes open. "_Nicky its going to be ok."_ I hold your hand lightly not wanting to hurt you. _"It does not hurt anymore. Just a little cold and scared that's all." _Tears were now flowing down my face. It hurt me so much to see and hear you like this. You were a fighter, and now it seemed like you were giving up. I tell you not to give up, that you could make it, but deep down inside I knew better then that. You look into my eyes "_You got to go on Nick." _I can't believe this, you are saying your good byes. NO, this cannot be happening. I tell you that I can't go on without you, though. It is getting harder for you to talk, but you go on._ "You've got so much to give. None of this was your fault, so never think that. Take care of them Nick. You need each other now." _It was getting hard to hear you. Tears were flowing freely down my face. No was all I could say. "_Yes"_ then you gasp for a breath, not having much left in you. "_Promise me, promise me Nicky." _I just nod not knowing if I even tried, if any words would come out. I lift your hand and kiss it gently. Your eye slowly close, a single tear rolls down your face. "_I'll always be with you." _With those words the room fall quite. The lines on the monitor went flat and I knew that I had lost you. My best friend, the only person who I ever truly trusted was gone. Nothing but a shell was left. Time was standing still. What felt like years, I just sat there and held your hand. Then I placed your hand across your chest and kissed your forehead for the last time.

I left your room with my head down. The others were waiting out side. Looking them in the eyes, they knew then that it was over. We had lost the person that had brought us together as a family. Life was not going to be the same after that second. Greg held Catharine as she cried. Warrick placed an arm around my shoulders. We all needed to get out of this place. We all walked slowly out of the hospital without saying a word.

The next few weeks were hard to truly recall what was happening. The whole night shift was given two weeks off with pay. We were all trying to be so brave, but in our eyes you could tell that we were all at a loss. Your funeral was the most beautiful thing I've seen. You had all kinds of flowers, thousands and thousands in every color out there. So many kind words were spoken about you. How you were such an amazing person, how you touched everyone's life that meet you. No one had dry eyes. Not even Grissom and we all know how he never shows his feelings. The team was the last to leave. We all wanted to say our last goodbye together.

It has been almost been a year since we lost you and not a day goes by that we don't think of you. It was so hard at first to even think of going on without you. We all had our good and bad days. But over time it got easier. I made you a promise that day and I have kept it. I will always look out for them till the day I die. You would not guess what is happening now. Our Catherine and Warrick got together and are now expecting their first child and guess what they are going to name her? Greg had become an awesome CSI. He reminds me so much of you, the fire that is in his eyes when he is working on a case. Just like the way you were. Grissom took the whole thing the hardest. He locked himself in his office for the longest time. He once told me that he never got a chance to tell you how much he loved you. Did you hear what I just said? He loved you. I hope that makes you smile up there in heaven.

I lay some Lilies in front of you tombstone. I trace my fingers around the engraving. I knew that you were looking down at me from heaven, so I look up towards the sky and smile. I tell you to save me a seat up there with you. A tear rolls down my face as I take one last look at your tombstone before I head down the hill.

Sara Sidle

Loved by all who knew her.

September 16, 1971 – May 15, 2005

**The End! **(But TBC)

_A/N: I hope you liked it! Thanks for reading it! You all rock. Let me know what you think. Oh by the way, I am going to be adding a second part to this story. If is going to be from Sara point of view. So if you liked this one keep an eye out of the next part. It should be up soon!_

_Jenn Sidle_


	2. Sara's Nightmare

_A/N: Thank you to all who reviewed the last chapter. I though I would write a second part to Time Standing Still, even though it was to be a one shot story. I wanted to do this chapter in Sara's point of view. I know that I am not the best speller or writer, but I do my best. So I do hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the last one! Thank you! Jenn Sidle_

**Time Standing Still**

Looking down at my hands all covered in blood I knew this all had to be a horrible nightmare. How could any of this be real? There is so much fear in your eyes, as you hold me tight. I can feel the life slipping away from me. This can't be the end for me. Even with all the fear and pain running through me, I feel so safe in your arms.

The years came flooding back to me, as if I was asleep in a dream. I still remember the first day I saw you. I was there to investigate one of your friends, but with that smile of yours, you made me feel right at home. We became close and I could not be more thrilled to know such a wonderful man. Even when I told you that I had feelings for Grissom, I could see it in your eyes that it broke you heart, but you were still there for me 100. Our friendship grew even more once I knew I could truth you. We are like brother and sister now and I could not be happier.

This night was like any other night. Nothing seemed to be any different. But if I only knew then what I know now, I would have told you all the things I may never get to say. But then you all would have though I had lost it and would just give me that smile and nod that you all do when I get like that.

It all happened to fast. It did not even seem real. We went to the scene, like we all ways do. It was all clear, or so that's what they said. We entered the room and began to do our work. We talked about nothing important, or so I would have though then, but now looking back it might be the last we will ever have again. No one seemed to realize that there was a back door leading in. The man who had killed his wife and ran decided to come back again. None of us heard him come in and we never though twice. But then it was to late; he had the gun on you. I knew something was wrong when you went silent. As I turned and saw the sight, I pulled my gun as fast as I could without thinking twice. As he held the gun to your head, I had never felt so scared in my life before.

"_Mr. Simons you don't want to do this."_ Is all I remember saying, as I held my gun tight. The sight in front of me will always be burnt into my mind. A mad man, who has already kill, now holds my friend with nothing to lose. If only I would have turned around and saw him coming none of this would be happening.

I told him that I could help him if he only put the gun away. No one moved or even seemed to breath what felt like an eternity, but in fact was only a few minutes. My words seemed to affect the man as he loosened up his grip. You knew that this was your chance and took action. You rammed your elbow into his gut making him loose the grip he had on you. As you try to get away he pushes you hard and you fell back into the glass table. As you fell he raised his gun, so I had no other choice but to fire at him. Three shots were fired, it happened too fast. The next thing I knew, the man was falling to the ground. You got to your feet as quickly as you could, but I never took my gun off the fallen man.

My one shot hit exactly where it was ment to, right through the heart. As you check the man, the pain hits me. You turn to me with the same realization in your eyes. As my knees give out, I fall to the ground. You race to my side and hold me tight. You push back my jacket and reveal a horrible sight. The man's two shots had found me one in the stomach and one in the cheats. Why was this happening? Why? That was what was running through my head as you tried to stop the bleeding.

I remember hearing you yell for help. The pain was taking over and I find it hard to focus. I can hear the two other men in the room. Brass must have come rushing in after the shorts were fired. As you hold me tight I can he Brass saying that there was a CSI down and they needed an ambulance right way.

The pain is getting worse now, I have never been so afraid. You have always been so strong, but looking down at me, it looks like you're about to break. It is getting harder to breath now and you start to cry. You tell me to hold in there and that help is on the way. I look up into your eyes and I have never seen them like that before. I ask you if your ok, I am just so worried for you. I can feel myself crying as tears fall down my face. _"Nicky I am so cold. Please don't let me go." _I just want to close my eyes and sleep, but I hear you tell me that I am strong and that I have to fight for you and the others.

The others, oh god. We were like a family. We loved each other in our own special way. I always looked up to Catharine. We may not have gotten along all the time, but I only wish that I turn out to be even a half of as great of a person as Catharine is. Warrick, I love that guy. We may have started off on the wrong foot, but soon he became my family and opened my eyes to so many great things. Grissom, my heart will always belong to him, even if his is not mine. He taught me to love again and to not cut myself off from the ones who love me. And Greg, oh god Greg. He is the sweetest person I have ever met. I am so happy that he became a CSI. I have never been so proud of anyone that much before.

I can hear talking around me, but I am unable to make out what anyone is saying. The pain is taking over now and I am slowly slipping into the darkness. I try to fight it off, but even my stubbiness is no match. My eyes grow heavy as you hold me tight. The last thing I remember before falling into the darkness was being taken out of your arms.

I slowly start to wake up. Had it all been a horrible dream? Nothing that had happened felt real. It was all in my head, I must have just finished a triple shift and that is why I was having these nightmares. But once my eyes were fully opened, is when the harsh reality came crashing back. I was in a room, with many people about. I have never felt so alone before as I did then. The pain was so over whelming that I just wanted to cry, but I stopped myself. Then one of the doctors looked over to me and realized that I had woken. He asked the others to leave the room. _"Ms. Sidle I need you to take it easy please."_ The young doctor had such a sad look in his eyes_. "You have been in an accident at a crime scene, you were shot twice. We have tried everything to fix the damage that was done…"_ He posed and looked me in the eyes. Pain and fear ripped through my body. What was he trying to tell me? _"…Truth is we never even though you would wake up again. I am so sorry but there is nothing left we can do."_ His words brought my whole life to a stop. All my hopes, all my dreams would never happen. This can not be real. Tears wall in my eyes as I try to voice my fears, but nothing would come out at first. I found it had to breath **_"I am dying?"_** Did though word really coming out of my mouth_? "Yes Ms. Sidle, I am so sorry." _The doctor looked away once these words came out of his mouth. So mush was running through my head, I could not get anything straight. "_Ms. Sidle your friends are all here and would like to see you. I will bring them in. Please save your strength. And if there is anything we can do, please let us know."_ The doctor got up and left the room. Anything they can do? Why can't they save me then? I had never felt so alone in my life.

I felt so tired and all I wanted to do is close my eyes and sleep. I fight off the pain and try to be brave. The last moments of my life were going to be that hardest. Saying goodbye to my family forever, I never though I would ever have to do this. They had touched me in so many ways. I was more scared of never seeing them again then dying.

Each of you came in one by one and said your good-byes. I could see it in your eyes how much it hurt to do this, you all were trying to be so brave for me, but each of you left crying. You were the last one to come in. It was so hard for me to see all that pain in your eyes. _"Nicky?"_ I ask even though I knew it was you. The room felt like all the life had left it. I was once so full of life, but now I could barely keep my eyes open. As you come close I try to be strong, but I am fading fast. You tell me that you are there for me. I smile weakly as you place you hands in mine. I tell you _"it is going to be ok", _with my voice just above a whisper. _"It does not hurt anymore. I am just a little cold and scared that's all"_ As tear now flow down my face, I can't believe this is the end. _"Sara you can't give up, you are going to make." _I had always been a fighter, but I had nothing left in me. I look into your eyes _"You've got to go on Nick."_ I can't believe I am telling you this. I can see it in your eyes, how much this is hurting you. _"I can't go on without you Sara."_ Tears are rolling down your face as you say these words. It is getting harder for me to talk but I go on_"You've got so much to give Nick. None of this was your fault, so never think that. Take care of them Nick. You need each other now." _I was talking barely above a whisper now. _"No"_ You were trying to be so strong but I could see you were falling apart inside. "_Yes"_ I gasp for a breath, not having much left in me. "_Promise me, promise me Nicky." _You just nod. You lift my hand and kiss it gently. My eyes slowly close as I no longer have the fight left in me and a single tear rolls down my face. **"_I'll always be with you."_**With those words I slip away into the brilliant light.

* * *

My life have been shorter then I may have wanted, but I know I was loved. I could not have asked for a better life. Yes not all of my live was great, but those hard times lead me to the wonderful life and family that I had in the end.

Nicky , you made me a promise that day and I know that you kept your word and that you will till the you day and we get to meet again. I watch over you all now. You could say I am all of yours guardian angel. I am so happy that Catherine and Warrick got together. That beautiful life that is growing inside of Catherine is going to have her mother's great looks and her father's kind heart. I can't believe what a great CSI that Greg became. He would have given me a run for my money. And Greg, when you ask if I would have been proud of you, the answer is yes! I have never been so proud of anyone, the way I am proud of you! I only wish I had that chance with Grissom. I still can't believe the day he told you how much he loved me. It brought a smile to my face. I just hope he knows how much I still love him.

Every time to come to visit me Nick, I hope you know that I am there with you. You always bring me Lilies. You knew that they were my favorite flower. I just hope you know that every time you feel the wind blow throw your hair, that is me. I will always be with you Nicky. Always in your heart. And one day in the very distant future we will be together again. I will always have a spot up here in heaven for you.

Sara Sidle

Loved by all who knew her.

September 14, 1973 – May 10, 2005

The End!

_A/N: I do hope that was ok. I know it was a little differently written then the last chapter. I did my best and thank you for reading it! You rock! Jenn Sidle_


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